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Trish's Corner

Came for a Goddess, Stayed for the Darkness

How I joined forces with Black Stone Sanctuary... plus: our first Zorbish meditation video!

Hello, and welcome to my corner of Black Stone Sanctuary. I'm Trish Deneen, and I've been some flavor of Pagan for 30 years. Finally I settled on devotional polytheism and contemplative animism to describe my beliefs and practices. I'm honored to be part of this newest iteration of Danica Swanson's vision of a full-fledged Pagan polytheist monastery.

A Google image search for an altar honoring the Northern European goddess Skaði led me straight to Danica's work. Besides our shared interest in the pre-Christian Norse pantheon and traditions, the other aspect that drew me to Black Stone Sanctuary online was her work with what she calls sacred endarkenment. In "Of Hearth and Shadow: A Contemplative Norse Polytheist and a Fledgling Animist Sanctuary," her essay in Polytheistic Monasticism: Voices from Pagan Cloisters (the first book of its kind; we call it PMVPC for short), she states that the neologism sacred endarkenment is used:

"...to denote the principles and practices of holding respectful space for beings and places of holy darkness, both literal and metaphorical. While darkness is often associated with fear, evil, ignorance, destruction, and negativity, we honor and inhabit darkness as a refuge — a gateway to deeper layers of insight, slower rhythms of life, and direct religious experience."

I'm a GenXer from the Midwest in the US. In the midst of personal struggle and chronic physical pain, I left a mainstream religious paradigm and moved into the New Age 1990s positivity movement that focused heavily on light and enlightenment. I became a wounded healer during this time as an energy worker and massage therapist. But I always found that my deepest healing and communion with Spirit came in darkness.

This affinity for darkness-as-healing started when I was a teen packing my migrainous head in a room with no light or noise but a whirring fan, and it continued with various healing practices and retreats in the '90s. Today I contemplate the Holy Powers with a backdrop of dark ambient, cyberpunk (think: Blade Runner soundtracks on repeat), low-drone, and nature sounds.

I also love light, pastels, daisies, the spring, unicorns, and puppy dog tails. For me, honoring sacred endarkenment isn't about denying light. It's about acknowledging the darkness as something powerfully positive.

I want Black Stone Sanctuary to exist in the physical world in alignment with the vision. But even if my personal life allowed for it, I don't have a desire to live in a monastery 100% of the time. I have "hermit inclinations" (PMVPC, p. 66) in my daily practice. What then do I envision my role in BSS to be? The following is the framework I use for my service work with the Sanctuary.

  • Continue to support bringing the Sanctuary's work onchain with art and posts, with the ultimate goal of finding an appropriate physical space for sacristan work.

  • Create art for onchain shrines to Skaði and other Holy Powers honored at the Sanctuary.

  • Flesh out retreat ideas for polytheists including support for hosting of dark moon incubation retreats.

  • Help dispel stereotypes about prayer, devotion, and Pagan monasticism, i.e. "lol, wut, only Christians do that" and "Wait, no sex?" Hint: Neither are true.

  • Create spoken prayer and meditation videos in honor of the Holy Powers we focus on here as well as on techniques such as grounding, centering, and shielding.

  • Make videos on my creative processes for archival purposes and to encourage artistic expression in others. This will include traditional and digital art, video creation, and AI. I will be transparent when I'm using AI in a piece.

Our first meditation video (25 minutes) is an example of the aesthetic and vibe associated with the Sanctuary. It's meant to be watched in a dark room when you have half an hour to yourself. Since Danica and I share enthusiasm for web3 spaces, it's available for viewing for free and as an NFT collectible on Zora. Music and visuals are the focus, so there are no spoken words, symbols (besides the orb), or hints of certain deities. It's for you to enjoy as your own mini retreat, and to commune with your Holy Powers.

I share Danica's vision that our efforts here may help bring Black Stone Sanctuary that much closer to being a physical reality. I hope this work will inspire polytheists long after we're gone, in a time when the phrase "Pagan monastic" doesn't seem like an oxymoron. To that end, I leave you with another quote from Danica in Polytheistic Monasticism that so inspired me to do my part to bring this vision to fruition:

"What we are doing matters...It's a lot of trial-and-error for now, and it's hard not to get discouraged when it seems like such an uphill climb. But if we persist, and trust the guidance we receive, perhaps we can leave some kind of lasting legacy behind for the next generation of polytheist monastic hermits, so that they might have an easier time of it than we have."


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#polytheism#pagan#endarkenment#animism#monasticism#meditation#video
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