On my back, I lie.
Arms out wide, cascading towards their opposite ends as if I were a plane whose wings held me in the sky.
My head lies back as my eyes rest within my gently closed lids.
I am moved, yet I myself am not moving.
That of which lies beneath me holds me to the surface.
Air enters into my being as it naturally does in this life.
For a moment, I pause my mind to appreciate the way that my body constantly flows life into me through breath.
An act that is seemingly overlooked yet holds the power of my presence in this world.
Air travels in through my nose and out through my mouth.
I am here.
My toes and belly, chest and thighs pierce themselves upward as if they are pulled towards the skies above.
Wind brushes my cheek as I smell the scents of the flowers that live near and blossomed recently.
Through my ears I hear life’s sounds, though they are muffled today. I hear and I listen to the sounds that surround yet in this moment their volume is pushed to the background.
Instead of the car screeches, bird chirps, voices and knocks - what is louder is the internal.
My minds desires and thoughts.
The sound of my body. It's churning and breath.
My heart that is pumping.
The gliding of my limbs.
The pace of my breath.
In this moment, my eyes open.
My gaze rests upward.
What is above is the sky.
It’s space seems infinite.
I see what is usual, clear blue and white poofs.
Though today, for a moment, its meaning takes on a new lens.
I am moved, though I am not moving.
Through this journey a story my mind creates.
My tendency is often tension. Perfectionism and stress.
For life to move forward, a plan must be at play.
I must know where I am headed.
My checklist I must make.
Perform to high standards.
The expectations I mustn’t miss.
As I lie here today.
As my being is in this space.
I am taken on a journey, where it is not I who finds my place.
I am moved to the left and then off to the right.
For a moment, I stay put.
The next my past focus is out of sight.
The questions of where am I going and where will I land,
In this moment feel fleeting
As I am taken on this journey of which the captain is not me with my feet upon land.
I feel myself exhale, much fuller today.
I feel tension is leaving.
My body’s beings relax.
For I have unclenched my hand.
My fingers rest on their own.
That rope of control to which I clung is ceasing to be known.
For I am moved, though I am not moving.
I am floating today.
The water that lies beneath me directs me on my way.
I am held to the surface as my limbs, jaw and face relax.
I am taken on a journey of which the destination, I do not care to ask.
You see, I held that rope of control until my knuckles turned white.
I thought I had to steer myself, if I did not, I would lose my life.
That path served its purpose.
From it today I know what I know.
But must be proactive in choosing to let it go.
Sometimes I have to believe, even when what I am believing is far from known.
So, today I choose to float.
And let life show me what next will be shown.
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