Cover photo

THE GLOAMSWAN FILES

it's happening again

She is sleeping well. She is disoriented as to time only and is probably in her second stage of depatterning. There is no incontinence, there is no mutism, and we are continuing this intense treatment of her until we get complete depatterning.

i've had so many dreams

I.

a flooded gloam • lit from within • hanging from the bottom • written in tongues • all these fallen leaves • artful & arranged • an aching sweetness • gliding the depths • the one you left behind • a crushing fog • the graceful ones • we sat alone • into the arms of destiny • a crowd of sunflowers • how to endure • nourish the bones • because you're beautiful • bent & scarred • endless suffocations • like a ghost • a hollow silence • strangled with words • a vale of hearts • our blood-warm palms • rain-soaked & distant • understanding is not required • before we knew • the sky behind us • the half-life of truth • our last exhale • incense & fire • music & longing • emptying our lungs • we can only listen • promises that overwhelm • a sparkling place • crinkled pools of memory • one day we will sleep • into life our gazes fixed • under bridges, cemeteries • sprawled across our skin • the dreams within my wings • the deep fade of morning • full of time • this side of the spiral • a terrace by the sea • salt & heat • in another lifetime • the curvature of you • this passing thirst • crimson & pink • a line in the sky • more than it is • an effervescent spectacle • circling our secrets • the endless reckoning • a cavalcade of one • elliptic & gray • i'd hold you if i could • it was worth it • violets & marigolds • parched earth, infinite seas • all our strength • my brother’s keeper • awake inside • hemorrhaging beauty • nothing to hold • you who make me feel • from the sky • filled with want • it’s come to this • floating, falling • a soft wind • these slow hands • delicate & blue • wisteria days, firefly nights • a moment of peace • colder than God • the snow, the stars • among the woodland ghosts • the grey men • it wasn't me • we may never know • how to breathe again • doubts & sighs • these vacant scars • we almost made it • silk-lined shadows • diamonds & rust • a new silence • large orange blossoms • too hard, too soon • body like a parade • a chirp, a howl • this dry land • a vague & constant joy • long rivers, fragrant earth • the weight of your voice • sweep it away • a life spent waiting • steep hills, low clouds • a welcome apparition • you know what i’m thinking • absinthe & musk • should have held on • backlit, punch-drunk • candy canes & cigarettes • threadbare hearts • gestures & signs • a face in the dark • all that once was • no one needs to know • i mean many things • in sound, we drown • patches of tranquility • all these plans • first times, old loves • warm echoes, velvet haze • lands without waves • i hope you’re a poet • vivid & shaking • ‪fading away, but slowly‬ • it’s ok, i’m sinking too • soft voices, quiet dreams • one pain of many • covered in need • an empty cage, the magic hour • take me with you • the hidden ones • your eyes, in flames • water & light • ‪so beautiful it hurts‬ • velvet moons • looking away • forged of glass • nestled in a breath • wakened by the crash • ‪the loves we’ll never know • a heady discontent • a quiet corner, mouth to mouth • expected to endure • poems without meaning • tremble & reach • ‪addicted to words‬ • an accelerating pulse • a pleasant malaise • oceans never lie • bedroom mirror, empty chest • soft manes & day-moons • indeterminate & vast • is it too late • blindfolds, bumps & dents • ocelots & aubergine • ‪chariots & end-times‬ • to love & let go • ‪as though we knew the cost‬ • their own scale & meaning • a hug too late • a lovely turn of phrase • the gathering dust • ‪silver lakes, wolves & moons • the fruit of our pain • these twisted lures • timorous creatures • a light touch, ear & neck • the sparrows fall • maybe this is a breakthrough • a rich vein • ‪to be in a body‬ • a novel creature • from web to leaf • that seagull strut • not strong, but stubborn • maybe we’re just tired • i didn't mean to leave • the eyes of generations • a moment of cruelty • lost, in the clouds • the violence of blossoms • a garden, a good death • of all things green • slightly, pixilated • ‪the fantasy of mastery‬ • gently trapped • the needs of our blood • a spark in every breast • ‪asynchronous intimacy‬ • ‪aesthetic ascetic‬ • ‪i have survived many things • an innocent carcass • addicted to regret • it's all too real • a quiet drink • this fragile form • a painted sky • whispers in the mind • the feeling of being, something • pulsatory creatures

you are a vapor trail in a deep blue sky

II.

desert bones • desolation’s song • through the tears, i see you • seen from inside • a lush certainty • this rain awakened earth • reaching to escape • forgotten mornings • stars without names • distracted from the vertigo • gray lichen, red berries • i’ve seen so much & learned so little • swallowed by the sea • we do not know the hour • a boreal light • a lost plot, returning • the comfort of dirt • these poetic entanglements • what do we have in common • the must of tattered maps • a slumber ignited • ephemera, freshly soaked • a boding sense of underwhelm • tell it again • throat cutting smiles • the gap between pines • attempts of half-hearts • slow, but deliberate • a rustling in the leaves • a curious dusk • betrothed to a mood • the roar of a life gone by • struck silent • us, but in chains • a simple word, not unkind • what is this fullness • inseparable from the bright • the outskirts of infinity • a breath collapsed • an unrequited life • taboo & its contours • there was a time • i forgot why i’m here • we’re going all the way • not a shallow wound • the key is here, somewhere • a tolerance break • angst gets a bad rap • it’s not what you think • our own dark corner • bespoke problems • another thing i didn’t need • tremulous days • no body to be found • the vanity of minor differences • these subtle acts of weakness • we had it all, for a time • i used to be a poet • seduced by shapes • a gentle anger • realized, but too late • the long road home • sweet sweet regret • trading days for hours • some of you will not be happy • this not unpleasant purgatory • do you feel it too • the flux & weft • in the shade of the forest • niched within the infinite • i miss my life, such as it was • robbed of the pleasure • ink-stained love • what would you have me do • it’s night somewhere • silence is preferred • best admired from afar • something within • this heart-shaped rage • on the spectrum of loneliness • he decided to live • misshapen identity • a dreamlike acquiescence • these birds behind glass • we missed our stop • the lie slips through, tender & sweet • it’s not too late, is it? • a pain whose time has come • how real should we get • hunted by demons • done with words • it was not a question • sick with art • no price attached • a world of tastes • the sun, dripping • hills like magic • whispered tales • no one is coming • on the shore, dying of thirst • if only i had known • a twinge in the chest • surprised i made it this far • hard edged lessons • i was happy once

as for her death, whatever explanation one may give of it will amount in the end to saying that she died of love

III.

love & open fields • what have i done • is today the day • cloth & steel, flesh & dust • sentimental for a time in which i never lived

we did everything we could, it was not enough

Attention Participants,

Gloamswan was a three year experiment conducted by [REDACTED] to examine herd behavior in terminally online degenerate micro-communities. Our study has now concluded.

Thank you for your time.

everything i want is already mine

to whom it may concern,

please accept this as my formal letter of resignation from the glass bead game as i have accepted a new position with the great empty sky

love,

𓆩♡𓆪

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