Keep your Identity small (||)
In Part 1, I shared notes from the episode exploring the powerful influence of stories on our lives. To read Part 1 check here
How individuals, subconsciously use stories to shape identity and influence choices. This connection between stories and identity is often stronger than logic, leading to situations where facts take a backseat to emotional narratives.
This phenomenon isn't limited to politics. Take my mother, for instance. Initially, she couldn't accept the truth about "fake water" because her faith was mixed with her identity as a church member, offering comfort.
Similarly, Apple doesn't simply list features when their CEO discusses how the new iPhone "improves family connection" They are crafting a compelling story that resonates with your desire for a closer family experience.
Here are some notes in this regard:
You can't reason anyone out of a place they did not reason themselves into.
Meaning, that if you can persuade someone to adopt an idea about your product, like Apple does, it becomes more difficult for others to persuade them out of it, even if the other product has more features and is more efficient. like Telegram over WhatsApp.
Copy the book of religions.
Observing how it becomes mixed up with the identity of the believers, it's the narrative it tells that provides people with an identity so they can't lose their sense of self, ensuring the preservation of their religion.
Tell stories that reflect the experiences of the people you're trying to engage.
Make them memorable, so they recall them when they encounter everyday objects like a bowl at home or a dog on the street. Use analogies that resonate with them in their daily lives.
When people say they can't stop using Apple sometimes, it's not all that they actually can't, but rather that it has become more about prestige or status, especially in developing countries. This has become entangled with their identity as a person. Use this information as you please to your advantage.
Humans are not that different
There is a theory of thought around emotional synchrony, that says:
When you see a child pointing at an object in their way of view, In most cases they are pointing and looking at their parents for a reaction that shows agreement, agreement that is “Hey are you seeing this?”, “Are we seeing this together?”
The guest breaks this down further to say, If you divide a person into 3 you get:
The stuff you share with all humans (universal).
The stuff you share with some humans.
The stuff about other humans we don’t understand (In reverse the unique stuff about us).
Reasons like this are why telling stories your audience can connect with is super important. By looking at the first two points, we can find common ground where everyone relates to similar experiences.
This is where you build your emotional bridge and connect with your audience.
In Apple’s case it's the “Family mentioned in the ad” In my African mother’s case it’s the second point, the faith she shares with her pastor. And the next point explains why it works.
People want to feel Heard.
People connecting with your stories should feel like they are on the same wavelength as you. It's human nature. USE IT!
If you get in a conversation with a customer or client, you need to make the person feel heard, using these actionable steps as a guide:
When you get a question or feedback from a customer or client or partner, repeat it back to them in a way that is charitable and authentic, so they know what you're trying to communicate.
Make sure you strengthen the fact that you understand them, and use examples and scenarios that help analyze their point.
After my third attempt with my mom, I reminded her about when Jesus turned water into wine and called for people to bring their own water, not buy his own. As we used the holy water she had bought together, I told her this story. She listened to me for an extra 10 minutes compared to before. But did she stop buying (the fake water)?
The thing here is emotional connections need to be made.
Concluding notes
Wrap your facts in your stories, let the facts of your product or service be connected by the narrative in your stories
Entertainments.
Striking emotional shock (some may and should surprise the reader)
Outline your good points, metaphors, and one-liners in another note somewhere.
Write the way you talk, to give you flow and momentum, talk to yourself while writing.
What keeps the story going is to continue asking questions you don’t immediately answer.
You can end your short stories with withheld answers, as your beginning and end are key.
When speaking, or talking, pay attention to your vocal tone, cadence, and urgency.
Lastly talking about things you are genuinely interested in helps, you have to be interested in using your own product!
Thank you for reading.
PS: My mom, She stopped buying it, (after 3 months of consistently talking to her).
Since this is a closed community, I kindly ask one thing: could you please take a screenshot of your personal best part of today's notes, something that challenged your thoughts, and share it with me?
You can do this by emailing them, sending them via WhatsApp, or making a tweet about them and tagging me @D_rounz. Thank you!
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