Cover photo

NFTs Are a Gateway Token

The Rug's Mostly Credible Newsletter #10

Chairman Gensler drops the mic after telling citizens to, "Just say no to NFTs."

Letter From The Editor

Dear eye doctors,

We're off to the races in Q1 2023 although we've been warned to take it easy by commissioner Gary Gensler who dutifully reminded us that NFTs are a gateway token. Somebody else has been smoking something because NASA scientists discovered hieroglyphic Dickbutts on the lunar surface, Elizabeth Warren banned leather crypto wallets for the environment's sake, and dozens of people flock to decentralized social media platforms.

There is also a new type of Layer 2 bubble gum, souls are getting "exercise" in the metaverse, Larry David got sentenced to two years plus community service, and Chat GPT is taking over the trading desk at Celsius network.

Our January issue of The Rug NFT [Limited Edition] in now open for minting, Under The Rug recorded its ninth episode, and we got an "easter-egg" shout out with BanklessHQ on their Weekly Rollup.

Ground control to Major Tom.

But First, WTF is The Rug Newsletter?

The Rug is Web3’s mostly credible news source. We take money, seriously.

If NFTs are the future of ownership, The Rug is the future of satire.  Think The Onion, but we actually understand (and like) crypto. Our Newsletter publication includes:

  • The mostly relevant articles

  • The hardest hitting headlines

  • Behind-the-scenes podcasts

  • Newspaper-style NFTs, and...

  • Much, much less

The Rug's Newsletter is where you can catch them all in one spot, str8 to your inbox.

Do rug a friend.

The Rug NFT January 2023

After 189 wallet addresses collected The Rug Vol. II Issue 1 we set our sights on the next edition. The Rug Vol. II Issue 2 is now available as an OPEN MINT on Ethereum. The price is an email. Future editions will not require an email but will simply be available for purchase from any Web3 wallet for .02 ETH. This is the last one that is open so bag it, snag it, and sell it to the butcher in the store room. Also, check for the whole collection on OpenSea.

The Rug Articles

L2 Arbitrum Teases Gumdrop

Layers twos are so elastic they've expanded into bubble gum. In this article by 0xJoshua, we figure out just what happened and why.

The market was primed for a disruptive new gum, resulting in the Cambrian explosion of “Ethere-yum killers” that proliferated during the 2017 initial gum offering (IGO) bubble followed by the so-called "Dentyne summer" of 2021.

Collect this delicious chewy treat as an NFT on optimism.

CEL Token Rallies on News That All Investment Decisions Will be Made by ChatGPT

Who would have thought that an AI engine could replace an utterly incompetent CEO. In this article by Perchy, we get an insight into the machinations of the machine.

Finally, I can sleep soundly at night, knowing that my funds are being managed by an experimental, numerically-challenged chatbot, rather than Alex Mashinsky,” said an anonymous Celsius depositor.

Collect this GPU intelligence based article as an NFT on optimism.

The Rug Headlines

POLITICS — Elizabeth Warren Proposes Leather Ban on Crypto Wallets

Warren is hawkish on the ecological sustainability of crypto wallets.

HEROES — George Santos Reveals He's Also Satoshi Nakamoto

George Santos can't be stopped, it's like a Scooby Doo ending.

FITNESS — Metaverse App Permanently Traps Your Soul in Better Body

A wide weary world where soul and body can float or die.

LEGAL — Larry David Sentenced to Two Years Plus Community Service for Role in FTX Commercial

Larry David was 'pretty pretty pretty pretty, guilty'.

BUSINESS — Dozens Flock to Decentralized Social Media Platforms

It's breathtaking just how many people are rushing to decentralized social media platforms.

BREAKING — NASA Scientists Uncover Ancient Hieroglyphs on Moon That Look Suspiciously Like Dickbutt

These dudes are always finding sophomoric ways to express their view of reality.

PSA — NFTs are a Gateway Token

Gensler does a mic drop after announcing his new "Just Say No to NFTs" campaign. This is his 'boom-shaka-laka' stance.

Under The Rug Podcast

Under The Rug is a crypto-comedy podcast based on the hardest hitting headlines in Web3. In each episode a rotating cast of the comedians at The Rug get together to chop peanuts, craft jokes, and discuss things semi-crypto comedy related.

Our eighth episode, "Watermarked", is now available. This eighth episode included Donald Trump NFT watermarks, H2O, high school football, Rugstradamus, parents not understanding, SBF's get out of jail free card, failed holiday crypto jokes, and much much less… Episode nine is in the can, and forthcoming in the next newsletter.

Calls to Action

  • Collect the January Issue of The Rug NFT

  • Send a link to crypto friend to subscribe

  • Join our discord and come hang out in the lounge

Bonus Content:

Listen to this excerpt from Under The Rug Episode 8, Watermarked.

Sponsor: Hit us up on Twitter.

Value for Value: If you enjoy any of our NFTs, articles, headlines, podcasts, or newsletters send what it's worth to TheRugNews.eth

The Rug is a media property spun up out of BanklessDAO.