Cover photo

An Unexpected Break - Issue 66

Unintentional but needed

How to begin? Frankly, openly and with accountability. What does that look like? An apology, an explanation, an outpouring of emotions? I don't really know. From this, it looks like questions and answers. I hope I answer any questions you have. And while I am sincerely sorry for creating an expectation of a weekly email and then not delivering. I am not sorry for not writing for a while. This break was very needed.

My CryptoGoonz PfP in Times Square. Courtesy of the Women in Tech 24 event.

I didn't realise I needed to stop writing my weekly blog until I stopped writing it. There are many potential reasons but the biggest one was the additional pressure it was adding to me, in various ways. People who read regularly, longer term subscribers and people who hear me talk, you will have seen or heard me talking a lot about expectations. I had high expectations of myself and the content/output I wanted to deliver.

I think I created a rod for my own back in terms of those expectations. My living situation from Feb 2023 until last week was all over the place. I reckon I slept in 10+ different beds over the year and maybe more sofa's. I am incredibly appreciative of family and friends that supported me. The biggest issue is that the most personal space I had in that time was a room.

It made playing in this world tough. When you have worked all day at a desk at the end of your bed, it is difficult to find the inspiration and the will to carry on working at a desk at the end of your bed. I didn't want to write for me, or create for me. I was willing to get involved in other things, but my own creativity was lost.

My will to focus on things for me was gone. I don't know how else to describe it. As soon as I started that creative process for me, I had no energy or motivation for it. And I didn't know how to manage or deal with that. This wasn't writers block or a wall. Not in terms of ability or thought. I wanted to write my blog. This was like situational lethargy.

The more I think about it, that situational lethargy was just being drained by my circumstances and situation. Tumultuous is the word for my living arrangements over the last 13 months, however, that is sorted now. I have a flat. It's got three bedrooms, or 2 plus an office. I have a comfort space. A sofa that is mine and not shared with 3 other housemates. It's a luxury I never realised I would miss.

Situations have a huge impact on our ability to maintain output. For me, that is the output that's relevant to myself. What do I mean by that? Well, some thing's I know I have to do even if I don't like them. That takes effort and energy. If I am not enjoying my environment I then lose the will to add extra effort and energy for me and the things that I enjoy. I'm sure many people understand what I am saying, even if I've articulated it badly.

An AI Generated image on NightCagfe, and the cover image on the collectible version of this blog. I was looking for imagery for my latest poem - Sugar, link above. This is the prompt I used to generate this image. "A large and detailed sugar cube melting into a chemical industrial landscape that insinuates wealth"

Anyways, what have I actually been doing? A lot is the answer, even if it doesn't always feel like it. And right now, aiming not to be too negative on X, but that's another story! I have been focusing the time and effort I have had, on helping people that I believe are making a difference, in and outside of the Crypto/NFT/Web3 sphere. That's mainly looked like supporting The Squibbles behind the scenes and putting time and effort into supporting two live events.

I was a co-host for 7th Polygon Showcase in January, hosted by Creative Owls and Women In Tech 2024, hosted by Vans_Cmkro. Two virtual networking events that are industry leading from my perspective. The opportunity to be part of these events is something I am grateful for, and I know the hosts value my contributions.

I believe Creative's, Jay's (the creator of The Squibbles) and Vans' visions have the power to go far beyond the current landscape we operate within. I am excited to see what these journeys transpire into and what opportunities arise from them. Not only for myself and them, but for everyone involved with these brands and people.

And then there is Goonz and PA. CryptoGoonz has been an interesting one, Chris and I are committed but busy. We both work full time and have other interests & commitments that eat into our available time. We have done a lot, but there is always more we want to do. From working on new art and the larger lore to finishing off the Goonelution and Sandbox. We have a lot to do. That does not mean we have been idle!

We have designed, manufactured and shipped our own key rings to NFT NYC, kind of like a proof of concept test. They are 3D printed and we have 4 different colours. Feedback before they have arrived has been good, I'm excited to see what people think of the physical product.

Polygon Alliance is a different kettle of fish. That falls into the bracket above, where I was talking about finding motivation difficult. It will remain a hub, initially for things Polygon and hopefully we get to expand it. There will be an FCancer event this year. Vans and I are due to finalise details after NFT NYC.

The 4 CryptoGoonz key rings available in NFT NYC.

What happens next. Are there more blogs to come or am I going to leave you hanging for another 6 months? There are more planned, that is for sure. I have given myself a hard deadline of two weeks for the next issue, but you may get one next weekend. Time will tell. I will decide a new regular time for blog releases, but it's likely to be the weekend, due to work constraints.

I want to start playing pool again, and that happens on a Thursday night locally. That makes Friday releases almost impossible. I also want to write more articles as well as maintain this personal blog. I want to write more poetry and play with AI around that, and I want to continue to play with Revel, a kind of NFT trading card app, with my photography.

I think the NFT's related to each blog issue will be free for a while. I want you to be able to start collecting them. Issue 1 & Issue 2 are also free to collect. I can't remember which other ones are free, if there even are other ones! I do have a separate collection for subscribers and the next claimable NFT will be released when I reach 400 subscribers.

The River Torridge at night

Make sure you claim your free NFT (Platform mint fee of 2 matic*). All you need to do is click on the collect button. It is that simple. They will be AI images for a while. The image will be in my blog, and the explanation for the image will be in the caption for that image.

Thank you if you have clicked on this and read it, from your email inbox or from X. It means a lot. And thank you if you are a new subscriber. I was thrilled to see I still had 384 Subscribers. I hope to continue to grow that.

  • Edit. Was unaware of 2 matic fee for mint at time of release.

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